Do Not Let Michael Barrett Give You A Bear Hug

Ahhh...the sound of baseball fights. There's nothing quite like 'em. Football brawls are awkward with all the pads and basketball brawls usually end up being fan-oriented. Baseball brawls, now there's some good old-fashioned fightin' and wrasslin'. A good baseball brawl has a few clear elements: bench clearing, poorly executed headlocks, sissy punches, and of course the obligatory pointing and shouting of empty threats. In the White Sox-Cubs series today, God's less loved child A.J. Pierzynski came charging home and knocked over Cubs catcher Michael Barrett. Barrett, clearly not thrilled, stood up and began yelling at Pierzynski. He actually embraced him in a pseudo-bear hug, then decked him the face, carrying out the secret wish of most Americans. Sorry A.J., you are not very well liked. Of course after the punch a rhubarb ensued with bodies flying everywhere. Scott Podsednik got his shots in, as did John Mabry and Brian Anderson. We all saw this coming in a way. People like A.J. usually end up getting socked in the face at least once their lives. On a side note, the White Sox won the game 7-0 and the Cubs continue to spiral toward oblivion. However, Chicago won't officially be a White Sox town until the Sox win seven straight World Series, the Cubs go 1-161 next year, Dusty Baker eats small children, and Osama Bin Laden becomes the GM. At least one of those things is attainable. However, I think Osama is more of an NHL type of guy.

Goddamnit, I guess I have to blog about it. Barry Bonds hit 714. Yipee. The only thing I have left to say is, Pedro Gomez, I do not relish your occupation.